Grit and grace two words that seemingly are opposite and yet I do not think you have one without the other. You see I have been pushing myself past all the comfort zones I had left since May when I started working out. As I have been pushing myself in the gym I realized that it was going to take grit to push past what my brain was telling me daily and I was also required to extend myself some grace because let’s be honest I’m not 20 something anymore. Somewhere along the way my coach asked if I would be interested in doing a competition. I fought it for a few days and when I asked more questions I found out the date…10.22.22. Without hesitation I heard “ok, I will do it” coming from my mouth. When she asked why I said yes I explained that it was Jason’s birthday and that was the best way I could think to honor him. 

So on 10.22.22,  my amazing teammate and I competed in the Festivus Games. If you don’t know what these are you can find out more on their website. The community was incredible to witness. The day opened with the national anthem and a prayer. There were athletes of all shapes, sizes, ages and experience levels. The Festivus games are known for being a great competition for beginners but they do make space for more experienced athletes as well. 

This is where grit entered the competition. It took grit to train and actually show up after a full week of homecoming events and chaperoning the dance the night before the big day. It took grit to go all out and finish each of the WODs…mind over matter. My coach has told me over and over again that it is just as much of a mental game as it is physical and while I knew that was true I am not sure I fully understood that as an adult competitor until the day of the competition. 

Leading up to this competition I wondered if I could tap into that competitive nature that at one point drove me as a young athlete. You see, I loved to win and I loved the thrill of any competition. However, somewhere between May 2021 and today I lost that edge and winning became less important than the people around me. I think loss and grief have a way of redefining what is truly important and the thrill of the win was one of those redefined things for me. So naturally I was conflicted because I know I can challenge myself to do more, to lift more, but could I compete? This is where grace entered the competition.

It took grace to show up the day of the competition knowing that it was going to be a hard day, milestone days are always filled with conflicting emotions. You are excited and nervous about the new thing you are trying and yet you so long for that person to be standing there cheering you on when you look into the crowd. It also took grace to compete because while I am not mentally and physically where I was when I started this journey I am far from where I want to be but that is all part of this journey. So now you see how grit and grace took center stage at this competition. 

The results came in and here is where we ended up: I finished all the WODs, I hit a couple of PR’s, and much like every day since last July I chose grit over giving up. I chose to trust that my Heavenly Father would meet me in my weak areas and help me push through. I acknowledged the emotions of experiencing another adventure without my love. More importantly I learned a little more about grit and grace.